Excerpts from the life of a cynic

“Hello! I am pleased to make your acquaintance” he said politely
“You are not. You say that to everyone don’t you. Is that the only lie you tell people you meet for the first time or are there others?” uttered my friend S

“Its called being polite”

“Uncharacteristically unrealistically polite may I say” said S

He looked at me for some sort of support to handle this strange situation.  He was right because I had not told him that my friend S wasn't only a bad mouthed ill tampered, ill mannered uncouth ill-behaved brat but he was also a low lying filthy scum bag of a douche. Without further ado the guy excused himself

“Why do you introduce me to these people sherry?” said S after he was gone

“and here he was asking me the same question” I told him

“Well! You should have told him I am a collector of artefacts from ancient civilizations and a master at composing contemporary music and that I am studying software development at Harvard”

“But why would I lie about all these things.”  I was candid with him

“I don’t know! These polite people like these sort of things” He retorted

“They like these things when they are true, S”

“ Ah yes! The truth. That overrated statement devoid of all imagination” he blabbered

“Your florid speech does not impress me. Okay a little bit. But not much”

“Didn't you hear what he said? He ONLY wanted to make an acquaintance out of me. That should serve him right to try to turn me into someone he knows”